Lest Thee Be Deceived About Deceipt

“Ah! lips that say one thing, whilst the heart thinks another.” – Edmond Dantes, Count of Monte Cristo…in reference to a distrusted neighbor.

Where is the line between deceipt that is acceptable and deceipt that is not? A woman may compliment a friend’s new hairstyle while thinking that the new style is not at all worthy of a positive remark. A father may encourage a young child about how beautiful a drawing is while actually considering it to be quite terrible. In the quote above, Dantes suggests that his neighbor is insincere in congratulating his good fortune.

Whether the matter involves a social situation, a family encounter, or even a business arrangement, surely it can be universally acknowledged that there are times when telling the full and complete truth would be inappropriate. In fact, it may be that not only will some portion of the truth be withheld, but also a false or insincere statement may be substituted. And even the casual observer will quite readily identify the point in such a situation as being to “deceive” or “mislead” or “lie,” though these words may be disliked in such a scenario.

So, when is it okay to deceive and when is it not? No, please don’t rush to an easy answer; this is not a black and white sort of thing. Ultimately, this is a “gray area” where circumstances dictate the appropriate path. If someone tries to tell you that they disagree on this point and that they always speak only the complete truth, you may rightly call that person a liar. Deceipt is a tool, a means to an end. Everyone does it. Sometimes it is right and sometimes it is wrong.

If the government decides to exterminate all children under the age of 12, you would be right to tell the soldiers at your front door that you do not have any children of that age and do not know of any in the neighborhood, though in actuality you are hiding 14 of such children in your basement.

If you witness a car which runs a red light and causes an accident with another vehicle, you would be wrong to tell the investigating police officer that you saw nothing, because this deceipt would be working against an orderly and safe society.

Sometimes things aren’t so clear and we end up with a real dilemma. Then begins the process of weighing various possible injuries and/or benefits that may result from one path or the other, striving to maintain some sense of balance and objectivity lest we overestimate some perceived benefit or underestimate some perceived injury.